Common Sense: Dude, you really need to check in with the internet. People on Facebook and Twitter are getting concerned with all the "DOOM! DOOM AND WRETCHEDNESS!!" status messages. Seriously, get on that shit.
Me: Hmm? No. No, I don’t want to write. Writing sucks. I need another nap.
Common Sense: Biz, please. You got enough sleep in the coma to last another three or four lifetimes. Get to writing. Chop chop.
Me: "Chop chop?" What are you, Mary Poppins? And anyway, I have nothing to write about. The Muse is also taking a nap. Everyone is taking a nap. Why don’t you try it? Here, turn around. No, I don’t have a 2×4 in my hand, why would you think that?
Common Sense: You do realize you’re writing right now, don’t you?
Okayfine. Hi, Interbutts! Tis I. And yes, I’ve been on radio silence for a week or so, because WOO BOY, have I been going off the rails on the Crazy Train. You don’t care, nor should you, but I’ve had my brain meds tweaked, and holy crap, it wasn’t good there for a few days. But! Other than the constant naps I still fall into like a narcoleptic, I am feeling much better. Which is good, because we have a lot to do around here. Right, Stewart?
YAH MAMA. LOTS TO DO AROUND HEzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz…..
Jebus. Okay, so what else has been going on? HEY! Did you know that last week was National Singles Week? I bet you DIDN’T, because you’re all in wonderful, perfect, loving relationships! Ha! Well I KNEW, because I was here, ALONE, singing emo songs to the cats and drowning my sorrows in black eyeliner and Butterfinger ice cream!
I mean, NATIONAL SINGLES WEEK? Is this just to make us pathetic, lonely, unloved cretins feel even MORE pathetic, lonely and unloved? And…cretiny? If so, WELL DONE, National Singles Week! I’ll send you my therapists’ bills! ALL MY THERAPISTS. And the economy sucks, if you haven’t heard, so good luck financing that shit.
Woo, sorry. Had to get that off my chest. MY CHEST THAT HOUSES MY PATHETIC, LONELY, UNLOVED HEART.
Okay, I’m really done now.
In happier news, the new TV season has started, YAY, which means I have plenty of dates every night DID YOU HEAR THAT, PLENTY OF DATES! WITH FICTIONAL PEOPLE WHO DON’T EVEN EXIST, BUT THEY LOVE ME ANYWAY! *SOB*
Common Sense: Okay, clearly she’s not over this whole Singles Week thing, so I’m cutting her off. I know you’re grateful, there’s no need to thank me. We’ll be back when this whole medication thing is sorted, but until then, I think someone needs a nap. Stewie?
STEWIE WATCH HEROES! STEWIE LOOOOOVES TEEVEE. ALSO, STEWIE HAS DATE. DON’T TELL CRAZY MAMA, OK?
PS: I’m really okay, guys. Thanks for the concern/virtual hugs/etc. I love y’all more than my luggage.