Oh you GUYS. You are so damn sweet and thoughtful I have not the words. I almost deleted yesterday’s post so many times, my brain whirling with "You are so selfish, so self-centered, so narcissistic to talk ooooon and oooooooon about your problems, just DELETE IT ALREADY."
But I’m glad I didn’t. That’s where I was yesterday. That’s where I’ve been countless times for what seemed like forever, and I know that I’ll be there again. It’s just another part of the disease. And I’ll pull myself out of it like I always do. But man, is it tiring. So I thank you. I thank you SO MUCH. I love y’all more than my luggage.
So today is better. Better than it’s been for a long while. I’m exhausted, but I’m digging myself out. And what better to dig myself out than bringing the randomness? Please to enjoy, for it has been broughtended.
- Y’all? I won’t give you any details, but that olive I gave Stewie the other day? In the name of bloggy humor? I had, um…forgotten what it does to his delicate, princess-like stomach. Please send a mop.
- There is nothing funnier than watching TV on instant messaging with SnarkyAmber. Psst! I’m linking her because I adore her, and maybe she’ll update now that I’ve given her a shout out. And big sloppy kisses.
- Lil’ Telemundo blew me a kiss yesterday, when he saw me from his fire escape. He was on his toy cellphone, as usual, so I understood that he didn’t yell "hola!" and wave frantically like he usually does. Kid’s got his bookie on the phone, I suspect.
- I may have bought shoes of shame this week, and lemme tell you, if you are buying the shoes of shame (they rhyme with "Mocks") online? The sizing is insanely WRONG WRONG WRONGY WRONG. I looked like a five year old in her mom’s high heels.
- So I was in Trader Joe’s today, and hand to Dog, the manager’s last name was such that it rhymed perfectly with "Clusterfuck." Can you imagine 7th grade with a name like that?
- Oh, and everyone wave to my mom! She loves it when I mention her on the blog. It makes her feel v.v. famous and important, and also pretty. Which she is. My mom has got it going ON, people. Oh, and step off, guys. She’s married. To my dad. Who doesn’t read the blog, because he thinks my grammar is atrocious. But we all love him anyway.
Let’s see. Anything else?
You heard the man. Bye everybody! And thanks again. Y’all are awesome.