The Story of the Pumpkin


The story of the pumpkin started out innocently enough. My mom sent me a Halloween care package to my dorm, and it included this stuffed pumpkin. Little did anyone know that it would become a world traveler. And the source of rage and amusement like no other.

At first, the pumpkin just kind of hung out in the suite, getting kicked around, covered in drunken mac and cheese makings, and more or less getting covered in dust bunnies. Then one night, (I won't say there was drinking involved, but let's just keep in mind that this was about the time I would drink a whole bottle of Boone's Strawberry "wine" and then go to work, after the Dawson's Creek drinking game. 

So we were watching TV and definitely not drinking, when KristaBat suddenly wailed "I HATE THAT STUPID PUMPKIN!!!!" And after we stopped laughing seventeen years later, well, the game was ON.

The pumpkin started showing up places. Hanging from doorframes. Tucked in people's beds. Sitting in the bathroom. Whenever someone would find it and deduce who had put it there, the pumpkin would get hidden amongst the culprit's belongings. The best place I hid it was in a moving box of Sadarose's, which I UNPACKED in order to put the pumpkin in, and then repacked and taped up. I am a very bad person.

Then, once college ended and everyone moved away, the pumpkin started its journey across the country. Care packages from the girls and me contained the pumpkin. The pumpkin was sent to boyfriends, mothers, etc. with the sole purpose of driving the other person crazy. This went on for YEARS. But then Sadarose got me. She got me GOOD.

I was living in LA with my now ex-fiance (less said about that the better) and we were planning a trip across country in a moving truck. Sada sent the pumpkin to my ex's job, and he popped up with it in an…um…inappropriate moment. I screamed and threw it across the room. Then the plot was hatched.

As we drove cross country, we took pictures of the pumpkin everywhere we went. Here's a picture of the pumpkin in Texas:


And here he is in Oklahoma:


You get the idea. So the pumpkin made his cross-country trip, and ended up back in Boston, where I had made a lovely picture album of the pumpkin all over the land, and presented it to Sadarose with the pumpkin. 

She wasn't amused.

Somehow the pumpkin is now back in my possession, and, well, Sadarose lives in Oregon, and…A care package is always a nice thing, right? Not at all evil and diabolical. 





The Story of the Pumpkin — 2 Comments

  1. “Somehow the pumpkin is now back in my possession…”
    Uh, maybe because I hid it in your shit the night before I moved across the country! Mua ah ah ah ah!
    By the way, my favorite photo in that album is the one that the pumpkin and I are in together ONLY I DIDN’T KNOW IT. Brilliant.

  2. My friend Kiley had a similar album with her ALF doll. Sean was NOT happy when I brought ALF with us to Hawaii. But I have some GREAT pictures of him chillin on the beach.

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