OH, the high school dance. Hahahhaa. Now, my school did not have dances, as that would not be befitting to the upstanding young ladies we were, hahahaha, so we went to OTHER schools' dances, oh yes we did, and would spend hours and hours getting ready so as to look HAWT AND AVAILABLE, BOYS demure and dignified to go to the boys' school and GET OUR GROOVE ON dance respectively at arm's length.
So one night, my sophomore year of high school, I went to a dance at the boys' school. I had gone out with a boy a couple of times, but he said that he wasn't going to the dance that night, and I said I wasn't either. That was a lie I told. I was totally going to that dance. So I went with my friends and what did my wondering eyes did I see??? MY boy, there with another girl!!! A tramp! A slut! THE WHORE OF BABYLON, oh my god, my life was over.
So I was in the hallway crying, when this long-haired musician type asked me what was wrong. He was so cute, y'all. Now he was the person to go to Sweet 16's with, the one who was two years older, and SO popular, especially for the ladies. He knew it too. So I told him what had happened, and he gave me his denim jacket and took me to the diner with all his awesome senior friends (The Lackawanna, or "Like-I-Wanna" diner, which was one of a gajillion diners we all went to, because, you know, Jersey.) We started dating, and everyone at my school ended up hating me, but I didn't care cause I had just met an amazing group of guys who are like brothers to me today.
And that dude, Stevil? He might not have the long hair anymore, but he's still my best friend in the world, and I love his family and his awesome girlfriend Meaghan Lady, and everything ended up dandy.
And the guy who dumped me at the dance for the trollop? They beat the snot out of him and shoved him in a locker. Because in high school, that's the most romantic thing possible.
Me and Steve, circa a long time ago