Actual Conversation: Non-Snowpocalpse Edition

Well. I am certainly glad that I didn't go forward with my idea last night to blog through the OMGWTFBBQ Snow Armageddon Event of Hades, cause nothing happened here. I am not complaining, mind you, I mean, my friends down in the DC area don't have POWER, and that blows. So I will say that although my experiment failed, I'm glad we got about 2 inches, instead of like, Little House on the Prairie-worthy blizzard of doom.

Which, of course, my dad would have loved. Who loves snow more than my dad? NO ONE. My dad wants BLIZZARDS EVERY DAY for the entirety of winter, and is always vair, vair grouchy when they do not come to pass. So, knowing my daddoo would be bummed, I decided to give him a call this morning, to offer my condolences. My dad, if you recall, loves talking on the phone. He loves talking on the phone almost as much as root canal with a rusty nail. So of COURSE I called him, because I am full of love.

Phone: RING!

Dad: *pause*

Me: Dad?

Dad: Yep.

Me: Hi!

Dad: What do you want.

Me: Snow FAIL, huh?

Dad: Yep. I've already been out. One inch. Pathetic.

Me: Well my friends in DC got hammered.

Dad: Not us. Never us. No fun for me whatsoever.

Me: Well, the DC people also don't have power, so maybe we should be a LITTLE grateful we didn't get much snow, you know. Not having power blows.

Dad: Which reminds me.

Me: Uh oh.

Dad: Do me a favor.

Me: Yeeeeeeeeees?

Dad: Open your damn shades. Seriously, I drive by your apartment and the shades are always all closed like you're some kind of demented hermit, and it's just weird. Stop being weird. Open your shades. For me. Just one. One shade.

Me: Okay, I'll open the shades.

Dad: So weird, you are.

Me: I'll open the shade!

Dad: The poor cats. They can't even look out the window.

Me: I. Will. Open. The. Shade.

Dad: Weird.

Me: OKAY DAD, BYE! Just wanted to give the report on the total lack of blizzard crisis.

Dad: Open the shade. Weird.

Me: Bye, Dad. 

CLICK.


Comments

Actual Conversation: Non-Snowpocalpse Edition — 3 Comments

  1. OMG that is like a phone conversation with my dad, except for the fact that my dad doesn’t live close enough to drive past my house on a regular basis. But I’m sure I’d hear about it if he did.
    “Demented hermit.” I am totally snorting over that one.

  2. You dad sounds like my stepdad.
    “Duane?”
    “Yeaaah?”
    “Is Mom there?”
    “Yeaaah.”
    *pause*
    “Can I talk to her?”
    It’s infuriating.
    Open. The. Shades.
    I open the shades every morning for our cat…and for our plants.
    And can I just say…your dad doesn’t think it’s a little weird that he drives by to see if your shades are open? Maybe he’s the weird one.

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