The good news: I am back in my apartment with a newly renovated bathroom. *THUNDEROUS APPLAUSE* Yes, yes, thank you. I’m pleased too. I’d show you a picture of it, but when I went to take the pic, I saw that my camera’s battery was dead. No problem, I’ll just charge up the battery. Alas, no. When I went to plug in the charger, it was cracked down the side and the wire was chewed up. Now. I know that *I* did not break the charger and try to eat the evidence. Since I found the charger on the floor next to where it lived on top of the bookcase, I narrowed my search for the culprit to one person. Er, feline. I’ll give you one guess as to which one it was.
You’ll never take me alive, copper!
The interrogation began.
Me: YOU. Orange boy. Anything you’d like to confess?
Finn: *blinks adorably*
Me: Anything happen when I was gone? You do a little exploring?
Finn: *washes paw*
Me: You see, I ask because when I left the apartment, the camera charger was in fine working order. Now it’s in pieces. This ring any bells for you?
Finn: *kneads my leg*
Me: The reason I’ve brought you in is that out of the three felines in this apartment, there’s only one who enjoys scaling the furniture and knocking things from a height onto the floor. Can you guess who that is?
Finn: Wasn’t me, mama. Wasn’t Finny. Finny doesn’t even LIKE climbing.
Me: Funny you said that, Finn. Take a look at some of the evidence I’ve collected and see if maybe you want to re-think that statement.
Me: NOW do you have anything to say?
Finn: *licks butt*
Me: WHY DO YOU CLIMB ANYTHING AND EVERYTHING IN THE WORLD?
Finn: Finny want lawyer.
Me: Do YOU plan on replacing that charger?
Me: So *I* have to replace it?
Finn: Nope. No more pictures. No more evidence. That way Finny can do ANYTHING FINN WANTS TO and Mama has no proof!
Me: *smacks forehead*
Finn: Was pretty much perfect plan.
Me: I wonder how much a one way trip for a cat from NJ to Siberia would cost?