A Text Conversation With Zap

Zap: Hello hello.

Me: Hola! Whatcha doin’?

Zap: Working. What are you doing?

Me: Trying to think of something to write on the blog tonight.

Zap: Write about how I’m awesome.

Me: Okay. Zap is awesome. The end.

Zap: Ha Ha.

Me: I’m totally doing this, by the way. This whole thing is going on the internet.

Zap: Use the picture of me licking the laserdisc.

Me: Really?

Zap: Totally.

Me: Okay!

Me: Okay, that picture is hilarious. You’re a sexy beast.

Zap: LOL

Me: HOTT. I’m getting all twitterpated.

Zap: I’m the only person in the world with laserdiscs. I’m awesome.

Me: We covered that already.

Zap: Say it again.

Me: I’m gonna say you’re very pushy with the compliments.

Zap: This is going to be the greatest blog entry EVER.

Me: Pretty much. Although I have to confess that you’re merely a pawn because I can’t think of a proper entry.

Zap: This IS a proper entry!

Me: Not really. But I’m rolling with it.

Zap: Are you really writing all this down?

Me: Yep. Well, except for the parts I’m making up. Artistic licence and all.

Zap: What are you making up?

Me: You’ll have to read it. Haha, I’m making you read my blog, which you never do because you’re full of hate and angry bees.

Zap: Well of course I’ll read it.

Me: Aw, that’s nice.

Zap: It’s about ME!

Me: Oh lord.

Zap: So when are you going to come visit me?

Me: When I get my car back. We’ll watch movies and veg out.

Zap: Excellent. So what other things will you write about me?

Me: That you’re a total creepster.

Zap: !!!!!!

Me: Kidding. But not really. No, really. Maybe. You’ll have to see.

Zap: I’m not a creepster, I’m awesome.

Me: We’ve already ESTABLISHED THAT.

Zap: Okay, I have to go work.

Me: Okay, I have to type this out. Muahahahah. You are at my mercy!

Zap: Hey, what are you really—


Zap: Fuck.


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